When my cousin in Tennessee messaged me on Instagram late last week, I wondered if the post she shared represented a consequential and seminal moment in Hawaii.

It was a post from 808viral, but this wasn’t an entertaining video that weʻre all used to seeing from the account. Instead, it was a question that should have been a punch to the gut for our leaders here in Hawaii.

Under the heading of “Letʻs Discuss,” 808viral asked: “Are Locals Happier in the Mainland?”

Daniela Stolfi-Tow, the founder of the account, was responsible for the provocative post to more than 300,000 followers. She said she posed the question on behalf of a follower and the post was part of the shift in tone sheʻs taken with the 808viral account in the wake of the fires on Maui.

“Let’s talk about it,” she wrote. “For those of you who live in the mainland, where are you and how is your life now? The good and bad? Do you agree Hawaii has changed and if so, what can be done to fix it? Is it fixable?”

Hawaii is on a cultural precipice and the responses to the “Happier in the Mainland?” prompt demonstrated the difficult reality for people who identify as local.

It’s sad that this is where the conversation has gone. It doesn’t take a lot of digging through the responses to the post to learn why locals are happier on the mainland.

Reading through the 1,300 comments, it became clear that a prevailing theme was the lower level of anxiety people experienced living outside of Hawaii. The lower cost of living and the greater opportunities for employment and home-buying made people happy to have emigrated.

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Stolfi-Tow said she noticed a few years ago that the followers of 808viral had shifted to the mainland. Not only are the majority of Native Hawaiians living outside of Hawaii, but according to the U.S. census, the number of Hawaii residents born in Hawaii versus elsewhere is almost even.

She believes social media has changed Hawaii. Technology has helped many locals maintain their identities and affinities online. 

“It’s done the best and worst here,” said Stolfi-Tow. “You see the uprising with Hawaiians, which is amazing, right? Because social media is really responsible for the power that they’re getting back and their voices are being heard.”

As far as the worst? Stolfi-Tow said it was the way national party politics have distorted our shared truths and values here in Hawaii.

The departure of Hawaiiʻs middle class for more affordable environs is changing the definition of local. What do you call a person raised in Hawaii, who would have easily identified as local but now lives in Las Vegas? My Civil Beat colleagues, Ben Lowenthal and Jonathan Okamura, recently dove deeply into those waters about what it means to be local.

Pili Yarusi, my cousin who lives in Nashville and shared the post with me, easily identifies as a Native Hawaiian “happier on the mainland.” 

Pili and I had a long conversation after the fires that devastated Maui because comparisons were being made between 8/8 and 9/11. Pili and her friends were staying with me and my wife in Brooklyn when the planes hit the Twin Towers. 

To this day, I’m amazed she didn’t immediately return to Hawaii. Instead, she persevered and remained in New York and eventually claimed the hard-earned mantle of being a New Yorker. 

She said she could afford to move back to Hawaii, but the opportunities available outside of Hawaii are so much greater. She can’t see herself returning anytime soon as long as the status quo prevails.

Yet, Hawaii is in a constant state of change. This has always been a dynamic place. For instance, when the rest of the world hears geologic time and thinks in terms of millions, if not billions, of years. However, here in Hawaii, geologic events are only a Kilauea or Mauna Loa eruption away from changing and growing our landscape.

People in Hawaii have anecdotally been OK with change. We’ve prided ourselves on our adaptability. We celebrate the hapa, the mixed plate and the palaka. The combos made us stronger and more resilient, but the content and tone has been shifting here in Hawaii.

People in Hawaii with long-standing ties to our island home are being pushed and pushed. We seem close to the threshold of becoming a place where only the wealthy thrive. 

So many things are broken. What happens when everything breaks?

The locals who remain here are the ones who will fight the hardest and toughest. I donʻt believe our leaders have a good feel for the underlying sentiments and the forces building under pressure here in Hawaii. 

There certainly isn’t the courageous leadership to stand up against the forces pushing those born and raised here to leave.

Stolfi-Tow and I talked for an hour about issues in Hawaii, and after me peppering her with questions, she asked me one: “Do you think it’s too late to fix any of this?” 

I told her no. I cited that one of the comments to the post said it was too late and people in Hawaii needed to simply accept what had happened here.

I didn’t agree. I don’t think it’s too late. I believe we can hold on to the spirit of aloha and find ways to keep locals here, happy and thriving. But it needs to be based on our own version of wiwo’ole, or courage.

Hawaii is not lost to the forces of the world beyond our islands. The spark is still there. Locals can still be happier here in Hawaii. We just need our leaders and our communities to be more committed and akamai to make it happen for our keiki.

We can do this.